My Parents and the Christmas Machine

Even though my dad had to take yet another pay cut and my mom is laid off, I cannot seem to get through their heads that they need to lay off the gifting this year.

My parents were the type that even though I rarely got anything during the rest of they year, it was a Big Deal to them for me to have a lot of presents to open on Christmas morning. I don't remember it much, actually. The presents themselves, that is. Sure, I remember having certain toys like a lite-brite and Barbies and Cabbage Patch Kids. And I think it's great for a child to have a few presents to open on Christmas morning.

But, they still want to get us a bunch of stuff. They'd asked for a list for Natalya, and I gave them a small list of possible things, like puzzles, blocks, an aqua-doodle, and baby doll things. Nothing over $25. In light of my mom's recent layoff, I suggested that they just get Natalya one or two small things if they wanted to, and that they forget about giving us anything- instead, use that Christmas club cash to pay for classes at the career center for my mom.

However, when I talked to them last night, it became apparent that they had not heeded my advice when they were telling me about the gifts they got for their goddaughter, and then they said that they found "almost everything" on the list I gave them for Natalya. I gave the list as a suggestion to choose one or two of them- not as a required list like a grocery list of must-haves!

Perhaps they get a load of enjoyment watching children open many many gifts. But at what cost? Clearly, (in my opinion at least) they could be setting aside that cash for current needs (career / training classes) or future ones (retirement) or even current bills (my dad's surgery). I would feel so much better if they had done that. They had saved about $1k in their Christmas club. I would rather they have spent $50 tops on Natalya and $50 on their goddaughter and put the remaining toward bills and / or classes. Isn't it a better gift to Natalya and their goddaughter for them to be around longer, in good health and spirits, rather than have a bunch of boxes to open? And then they mentioned giving Mike and I cash to help pay for a new computer (mine is nearly 8 years old).

I just cannot get them to listen. I mean, goodness, my daughter is 2. She does not fully grasp the meaning of Christmas and I don't want to instill in her that Christmas is when grandparents bring you a bunch of presents! I want it to be more than that for her. That is why we aren't doing "Santa Claus" for Natalya. Mike and I agreed on that a few years ago and we're sticking to it. No pictures on "Santa's" lap, etc. I'm sure that frustrates my parents, but that is my choice as a parent. I suppose it is their choice to spend their money on gifts, but as a parent, I want to be able to limit how much "stuff" my child receives. I'd rather she get monetary gifts to save for her future, if she has to get a gift. (getting off soapbox now!!)

Besides, Mommy has lots of presents for her! I am 2/3 of the way done with the felt story boards and will do a post with pictures. I also have a shopping bag of crocheted foods for her, some books and puzzles, and she will get either a tub of dress-up clothes or a rescued from the curb dollhouse with people and accessories. I haven't decided which one of those two. The other that she doesn't get, will be saved for her 3rd birthday next year.